Joan C. Webb
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   Joan's BLOG

Thankful for That Imperfect Marriage

11/25/2010

1 Comment

 
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On the Way to Becoming the Perfect Wife

I wanted to be a perfect wife—to be all Richard desired and make him happy that he married me. But my initial goal turned into obsession. I felt compelled to modify my personality, beliefs, talents and hopes to match his. It looked good, but it felt awful.

Eventually, my unrealistic expectations led to burnout. The outward me could no longer live in disharmony with the inner me. I had to do something or crumble. Yet the thought of changing the way Richard and I related to each other scared me.

“What if you don’t like me or our marriage when I share the real me?”

“I will,” assured my husband.

At first, I didn’t believe him. And truthfully, adjusting our conditioned relational patterns—the way we had learned to interact with one another—felt unfamiliar and awkward to us both. Yet gradually we’ve grown more comfortable accepting our differences and sharing our needs, vulnerabilities and desires.

We’re discovering how to combine who we are on the inside with what we appear to be on the outside. I think we’re growing into the individual persons God created us to be. We’re also enjoying our imperfect relationship. And I’m grateful.Extremely grateful.

What unlikely “thing” are you grateful for this Thanksgiving 2010?


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1 Comment
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6/6/2013 03:57:56 pm

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    Joan C. Webb

    Writing, teaching, coaching to empower and set free.
    Joan is an inspirational speaker, Bible teacher, Life Coach, and author of 13 books including It's a Wonderful (Imperfect) Life, The Relief of Imperfection, The Intentional Woman. She does consulting, as well as Life Coaching, for writers, speakers, ministry leaders and entrepreneurs.

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"Are you tired? Come to me. ...Keep company with me and you'll learn to live freely and lightly."
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  • Home
  • Blog
  • Spiritual Direction
  • Life Coaching
    • Life Coaching Brochure
    • What Others Say about Life Coaching
    • LifePlan Brochure
  • Enneagram Coaching
    • What others say about the Enneagram Coaching
    • Contact Joan About Enneagram Coaching
    • Enneagram Spiritual Formation Coaching Resources
  • The Intentional Woman
    • The Intentional Woman Mission/Vision
    • The Intentional Woman Authors
    • IW LifePlan
  • Freebies
  • Books
    • Nourishment for New Moms
    • The Intentional Woman
    • The Relief of Imperfection
    • It's a Wonderful (Imperfect) Life
    • Everyday Wisdom
    • Devotions for Little Boys and Girls
    • Meditations for Christians Who Try to Be Perfect
    • Joan's Writing Contributions
  • Connect with Joan
    • About Joan
    • Listen to Joan